Today’s Washoe County Commission meeting should be a real show. On Agenda Item 16, commissioners will decide which two of their own will sit on the shiny new study board tasked with exploring a county fire protection district. This comes courtesy of Senate Bill 319 (83rd Legislature), which mandates a look at consolidating fire services across Washoe County and the Cities of Reno and Sparks.

Sounds straightforward—until you ask who will get the seats.

Back in 2024, Commissioner Mike Clark’s attempt to direct $10,000 in discretionary funds to the Reno Toy Run blew up in spectacular fashion. The spark? A vest.

More specifically, a “swastika vest” worn by a member of the motorcycle club The Branded Few inside commission chambers — an image that Channel 4 in Reno blasted across the airwaves. Outrage followed fast, and Commissioners Mariluz Garcia and Alexis Hill jumped in to support revoking the funding.

The club, under pressure, promised to remove the symbol from their jackets. That was supposed to be the end of it.

Gadzooks, Washoe County — it’s getting weird out there.

One moment, Cari-Ann Burgess, the former Interim Registrar of Voters for Washoe County, was the golden child of elections. Handpicked, praised, and defended at public meetings with the kind of confidence usually reserved for utility heroes and budget surpluses.

Now? She’s being painted as grossly incompetent — by the very same government that hired and defended her — as part of a legal strategy to dismiss her wrongful termination lawsuit.

Cue dramatic music. Enter: Bat-Signal.

A Department of Justice (DOJ) letter gets mentioned during public comment by Penny Brock — one of those rare unicorns who both speaks at meetings and actually reads government documents.

Following Brock’s comment, someone somewhere inside the county apparently freaked out just enough to send out an internal email making it abundantly clear that the letter in question was sent to the Nevada Secretary of State — and definitely, absolutely, cross-your-heart-not-going-to-be-shared with Registrar of Voters Andrew McDonald.

Let’s rewind the tape on a little episode of government dysfunction that Washoe County officials would now really prefer we forget — but we won’t.

At center stage is Sober 24 Testing Services, the county-run operation that was supposed to ensure accountability in the courts but instead became a hub of questionable leadership, opaque operations, and now — surprise — the focus of multiple investigations.

Try Seven Layers of WTF.

Why was the Media excluded from "transparency" effort following years of quality concerns

Nothing says "we take senior nutrition seriously" quite like scheduling a crucial kitchen tour with two days notice during the Fourth of July holiday weekend, then excluding the media from what's supposed to be a transparency initiative.

That's exactly what Washoe County pulled off this week with their Senior Advisory Board kitchen tour of the TRIO facility where senior meals are prepared. The county sent out their notification on July 2nd—two days before a major holiday.

Washoe County’s budget crisis reveals some twisted priorities, putting staff over services, and politics over public health. Despite $27 million deficit, officials choose to cut mosquito control, deny a fire station, and ignore radon concerns rather than trim administrative bloat

Washoe County residents are about to learn a harsh lesson about government priorities: when push comes to shove, protecting bureaucratic jobs matters more than protecting public health and safety.

After hiring outside consultants to evaluate its County Managers Office leadership dysfunction, Washoe County got exactly what it paid for: a detailed Raftelis report outlining what many residents have known for years—there’s a breakdown in trust, communication, and strategic priorities at the top.

But instead of focusing on the actual substance of the report—like rebuilding credibility or creating a strategy that doesn’t resemble a bureaucratic scavenger hunt—Commissioner Mariluz Garcia had a different takeaway: Let’s move commissioner comments to the end of meetings. Because obviously, the real problem here is the order of the agenda, not the disconnect between elected officials and the public they serve.

Washoe County has effectively silenced homeless residents at the Nevada CARES Campus by minimizing Community Homelessness Advisory Board (CHAB) meetings since September 2023. This started after Teresa Bacon, a resident, publicly criticized the County and Commissioner Alexis Hill about conditions at the campus. Rather than address Bacon's concerns, the County launched a counter-campaign against her.

While Washoe County Human Services staff swears the senior meals are "pretty good" (presumably between bites of their county food truck scheduled lunches), Commissioner Mike Clark has spent 18 months fighting an uphill battle for basic dignity in senior nutrition. But why let quality food get in the way of bureaucratic convenience?

In a masterclass of transparency, the county refuses to show even their own commissioner the competing bids for contract #3255-24. Apparently, elected officials don't have the security clearance to see what county employees are reviewing. Makes perfect sense – if you're writing a satire about government dysfunction.